It's difficult isn't it? Any shape or size we are, we still want to change something. I talk about women often but it is all genders really. It is so complicated, even moreso for those who don't feel at home in their bodies. Imagine, being born in a body that wasn't meant for you.
Then there are bigger bodied men, who have almost no outlet for body positivity.
And then there are those who don't understand body positivity, those who don't quite get the "health at every size" movement.
Who think it is somehow encouraging unhealthy habits, when it is really quite the opposite.
There are fat people, who are constantly treated differently because they aren't what they're supposed to look like. Those in bigger bodies are often unable to get the medical attention they so desperately need because the only answer they hear is "lose weight", and so many people believe that is the only truth. The "ultimate" truth - That losing weight will solve everything, that it will make you happier, it will get you more friends, people will like you more. But just because you shrink down, doesn't mean things are magically better.
Our society, obsessed with bodies, obsessed with changing them, starving them, the list goes on. People genuinely believe I don't take care of myself because of my belly, when really I put so much thought into my food and my movement. I cook often, thinking of how I can make my meals more nutritious and delicious. I move my body, do my yoga, do my exercises so my mental health can be better. Yet, because of my size, I am labeled as unhealthy. Even though there are smaller bodies out there that might be struggling health wise, it is over looked.
Just like the patriarchy, stereotypes are engrained in our society. We are used to hearing "that's just the way things are". It's all we have known - "fat is bad, skinny is good". So of course we don't see outside of that. "Female and male are the only two genders". Same sex love is "wrong". Of course those who don't feel connected to the gender they were assigned at birth feel so isolated.. Of course LGBTQIA+ folks feel like they have to like the opposite sex, because that's all we have known.
Times are changing, but weight stigma, stereotypes, fatphobia, transphobia, homophobia, racism.... all of it is very real and very present. So it is so important to remember you aren't alone, and that our mindset can change.
*Sigh* Racism still exists.... can't believe I have to explain this.
Imagine having a certain skin color. You are a wonderful, kindhearted person. All you want to do is be kind to others and help others. Your skin is dark, beautiful, deep. Yet, people cross the street when you walk by. You fear for your life when you get pulled over for driving a little too fast. You are always scared, you are always worried. And people don't even understand how their actions are hurting you. People question you, say you are too sensitive, say that they don't see "color". That systemic racism doesn't exist. Other people are telling you what your experience is.
"We have come a long way"... sure. In the grand scheme of things, times are not as horrible and separated as they used to be. But awful, hateful people are still out there. And even those who claim to be advocates still stumble. I still stumble endlessly, I am learning the appropriate language to use, the right way to approach and advocate. It's work. You have to do the work in order to make change.
I read scientific articles that prove implicit bias. I read articles about weight stigma in the medical field. I research and learn in my master's program how those in poverty are extremely negatively affected. How privilege is a very real thing. Yet here we are, still fighting to be understood.
I cannot speak for the BIPOC community, but I can speak up on their behalf. To tell you that we have a long ass way to go.
I can speak for the big girls, it is so hard to be respected or understood because of our size. I can't find certain articles of clothing because they won't sell plus size clothes in some stores. I cry when I try on every bra claiming to cater to bigger bodies... when really it is still so tight on me.
There are so many groups of people out there that are ostracized. That are misunderstood, That are judged. And I can only speak from a tiny bit of perspective. I still have loads of privilege as a white woman. Imagine how those who live in poverty, who are not white, who struggle constantly and aren't getting any help. It's time we start putting ourselves in others' shoes, for real. To stop labeling others and saying what they should be doing, or what they should not be doing. How dare we question somebody's choices when we have no idea what their circumstances are like.
The bottom line is ~ to be silent at this point in our time is to be complicit. There are ways that you can step in and speak out. Even if it feels uncomfortable. There are ways that those with privilege can really step in and make change. If you see something, just fucking do something. Distract, say something, interfere in some way. Especially if it is safe to do so.
Cis white men tend to have the power, the control, the ultimate privilege - if ya don't believe it, I have some great master's level readings I can share. Cis white men could start speaking out more. They could advocate, They could use that privilege to advocate for those who cannot advocate for themselves, for those that are constantly ignored and overlooked.
It's time we fucking step up.
-https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/voice-echo-speaking-up-against-injustice-margaret-yeung?articleId=6691132978153754624
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